Pages

Thursday, June 16, 2011

What Would You Do?

This summer has finally come (weather wise anyway), and I thought I would be a good mom and let my 7-year-old-son invite a friend over. He rarely is able to have friends over because of my oldest son and his autism. I know that sounds bad, but hear me out. He is my height and 100 pounds. He wants to play with his brother and friend. But, brother and friend want to run the neighborhood like little boys do. My 10-year old (Seth) RUNS!! and runs very fast. I can't catch him. Plus, I just had a baby and feedings are still taking place every two hours.

Anyways, back to the story. The friend came over and as usual they were coming in and out to play. When they would go out, Seth would hang on the door and cry, he wanted to go with them. So, after the fourth time I loaded the baby in the stroller and off we went on the bikes. Yeah, I ran. A LOT! Boy, I'm so out of shape. Seth actually did really well and stayed with the boys on the freaking MILE bike ride. He even came home like he was suppose to without a fight.

It was later that broke my heart. The boys wanted to play with just them, no Seth. So, outside they went and locked the door. The look on Seth face made my heart weep. I felt so bad because I couldn't go out to keep him where he was suppose to be and I couldn't tell the boys "Sorry, you have to be bored and stay in the back yard". (Well I could but didn't.) Seth sat by me while I was feeding the baby and whimpered "play" over and over.

What do I do? This is why we don't have my younger son have friends over. I feel bad that he always has to go over to everyone else's houses but it's just not fair to leave Seth out. Really? Am I doing the right thing?  

2 comments:

Raree said...

Oh, that's so tough. Poor kid. Wish I had some helpful ideas! Laci, I know you don't really have any choice but I really don't know how you do it! Good luck figuring it out.

Anonymous said...

Hard place meets rock - you're stuck.

This can happen even without autism in the family. The 7 year old is getting older and more independent while the 10 year old is use to having his brother around when he plays. I went through something very similar with my little sister growing up. And it's happening with my nephews.

My best word of advice is teach both kids that they need to have their own time. I'll bet there is something Seth does that he doesn't want his little brother to mess up. Maybe compare something like that.

I don't know really, I can imagine how hard it is. I'm just telling you what my mom did for us and what my sister does for her kids.

Good luck Laci,

Amber